"Ever since puberty, ever since I was 11 or 12, I’ve had cyclical depression. That’s something that..."

Ever since puberty, ever since I was 11 or 12, I’ve had cyclical depression. That’s something that has been a defining feature of my life as an adult. It’s manageable. But it’s real. And it doesn’t take away from my joy or my work or my energy, but coping with depression is something that is part of the everyday way that I live and have lived for as long as I can remember.

Depression for me, you can’t distract your way out of it. … When you are depressed, it’s like the rest of the world is the mother ship, and you’re out there on a little pod and your line gets cut and you don’t connect with anything. You sort of disappear. And so it’s not something you can talk-therapy out of. It’s really a chemical thing. You get adrenaline from work, but adrenaline is not a cure.

Рейчел Мэддоу (Rachel Maddow) о депрессии в интервью на передаче Fresh Air в NPR

Это “you sort of disappear” — обратная сторона установки «меня не существует», постоянного, непреклонного внутреннего состояния, которое приходится как-то преодолевать, чтобы хоть на шаг сдвинуться вперёд.